What Fuels You?

Ever ask yourself, "Why am I doing this again?"

How do you fill your proverbial tank?

Hi Everyone! Hope you’re enjoying spring. It’s been really lovely in New Jersey. Picture the simultaneous blooming of cherry blossoms, magnolias, forsythia, and whatever this is:

Like fall, spring fills me with new project energy That said, after releasing my last thriller and gearing up for the launch of my romcom/momcom next month, I’ve been enjoying a break between larger writing endeavors. And yet during these downtimes I can never quite relax. I’m always wandering around a bit lost, thinking," “Shouldn’t I be doing something else? And if so, what?”

I’ve never been an athlete (unless you count gentle stretching before bowling) but I imagine running a marathon and finishing a manuscript are similar in that by the time you’ve made it to the end, you’re wrung out, a bit in awe you got that far, and probably asking yourself, “Would I ever do this again?”

Once you’ve completed something challenging, for better or worse, you know exactly what it entails. With that, I’d love to know: What fuels you? Where do you find the drive to begin again?

I’ll tell you what drives me and it’s not pretty.

I had lunch with a dear friend from high school last week and I brought her a copy of You Shouldn’t Have Done That. To me, it feels really narcissistic to give someone your book, but at the same time I didn’t want her to pay for it. (This explains why I failed at any early career in sales.) Anyway, she recently left a long-term position and we were talking about what’s next for us. I joked that I’m running out of ways to murder people in fiction but conceded it was probably time to start something new. Giddy from a delicious Prosciutto, burrata, and fig jam panini, I said, “Part of me is just writing out of spite now. You know, like when Larry David opens his spite store…”

I realized after I said it that maybe I wasn’t kidding. Here are a few reasons why.

Three years ago I contacted this local bookstore that advertises itself as being very “local author friendly.” I asked about holding a book launch event for The Perfect Neighborhood and they quickly told me, “Sorry, we’re not doing any events.”

Reader, an hour later I received their newsletter chock full of author events. I wanted to reply, “Oh no, someone better tell these dozen authors you’re not doing events!”

I’m not alone. I can name four— yes, 4!—author friends who’ve been treated similarly by this shop.

You know where I’m going with this. Each time I open a fresh document and type Chapter One, I engage in a little fantasy in which the novel I’m about to write is so wildly popular that the owners of that bookshop reach out and ask if I’d consider a signing or a reading at their store, and I say, “Sorry, I’m not doing any events.” (Who am I kidding, I’d probably race over there with all my finest Sharpies and bookmarks…but still…it’s fun to dream.)

Last August when I attended the Bouchercon thriller conference I was on a panel about revenge. My fellow panelists and I agreed that revenge makes an excellent motive for a villain. I also shared that sometimes I view writing as an act of revenge. Who am I avenging? Thanks for asking!

One afternoon during my sophomore year of high school, my English teacher kept me after class. Nerd that I was, I knew I wasn’t in trouble nor did I think my Great Gatsby paper was illuminating enough to warrant a sidebar, so I was curious: what did she want?

Though I had a solid B in her class, she told me I should consider dropping out of the honors track. If I hadn’t been holding back tears, I might’ve said, “Look, lady, I’m routinely picked last for gym, I can’t play an instrument or even draw stick figures, and I wear way too much plaid to gain entry into the gearhead/smoker crowd. Reading and analyzing Willy Loman (it was a big American Dream year) is all I’ve got! Don’t take this away from me.”

I didn’t switch tracks. Instead, I worked harder and with each better grade, I thought Take that, Charlotte! (Actually, I thought much worse things but I subscribed my kids to this newsletter to boost my numbers so you’ll just have to use your imagination here.)

In some ways I’ve been writing as revenge ever since. Of course if that teacher saw my royalty statements, she might say, “See? I tried to tell you!”

So to answer my own question, I suppose I’m fueled by a spite & revenge cocktail (just add ice!). But at the end of the day, I don’t know if it matters where or how we find the fuel to keep going as long as we show up and move forward.

What else is new?

The House on Cold Creek Lane’s paperback edition was released on Tuesday. I posted about it on Instagram along with a quiche recipe (my go-to brunch dish) that appears in the story. I’m running a US-only giveaway, so if you’d like in, click on the post below and leave a comment. The winner will be announced Sunday.

lizalterman

A post shared by @lizalterman

What I’m Reading?

On Sunday morning, I sat in my driveway after a bagel run listening to the last few minutes of What Now? the speech Ann Patchett delivered at her alma mater Sarah Lawrence College. (Thanks to

Emma Gannon

for the recommendation.) I adored it all but this part really stayed with me. (Please don’t sue me for copyright infringement, Ann, I love you.)

What now? is not just a panic-stricken question tossed out into a dark unknown. What now? can also be our joy. It is a declaration of possibility, of promise, of chance. It acknowledges that our future is open, that we may well do more than anyone expected of us, that at every point in our development, we are still striving to grow.

I also listened to Broken Country by Clare Leslie Hall. The writing and narration are stunning but you have to be in the mood for a lot of “if only”s. I’m putting this in the same category as the “Eulogy” episode in this season of Black Mirror, beautifully done but maddening nonetheless.

I was fortunate to get an early copy of Dear Writer by

Maggie Smith

. I loved Smith’s memoir You Could Make This Place Beautiful and before that Keep Moving so I’m thrilled to dig in and as you can tell from the above, I’m seeking inspiration!

Where I’ll Be

Local Author Day at the Princeton Library Saturday, May 10, 1:30 to 4 p.m.

Celebrating the launch of Claire Casey's Had Enough​​ with Shannon Russell, author of Start Your Second Act: How to Change Careers, Launch a Business, and Create Your Best Life June 8, 3 p.m. at The Book House in Long Branch, NJ. Please join us if you can!

What I’m Doing

I love taking classes (except when people suggest I drop out). Last fall I signed up for BBC Maestro and enjoyed watching authors Harlan Coben, JoJo Moyes, Isabelle Allende, and Ken Follett share their backstories and their processes. Their agents and editors made guest appearances and I learned a ton.

Last month, I was invited to join Reedsy’s How to Write a Novel course with Tom Bromley. It seemed like the perfect time as, again, I’m hoping to motivate myself to start something new.

The goal of this course is to write a first draft in 101 days. It typically takes me a year or more to do that but I’m always curious about how to draft faster. I’m not sure it’s in me. BUT! The course began this week and I’m loving it!

In addition to a weekly live class, there are pre-recorded daily lessons. I am afraid it may cost me a fortune as I want to buy all the novels Tom shares as examples of introducing character, backstory, and grounding the reader. One of the first nuggets of wisdom I’d like to embrace is “don’t look back.” I’m very guilty of this when I draft and lose a lot of time rereading and stewing over a word. I’ve gotten better about leaving myself a comment like “Find a stronger verb here!!” and then Future Liz hates Past Liz but I’m going to give this a real try. Weekend videos feature a panel of expert authors who share their advice. We also have the opportunity to get and give feedback within our cohort. I don’t have anything shareable just yet but I hope to get on that soon! I’ll keep you posted as the course continues!

Full disclosure: the above is an affiliate link. If you make a purchase through this link, I may earn a commission at no extra cost to you.

Time for my obligatory cat photo:

Upon hearing I may begin a new project, Boots immediately thought, “Please don’t force me to listen to any more of your rough drafts!”

As always, thanks for reading!